Being a farm wife is a hectic job.  Being married to a farmer often means that I find myself eating meals in a tractor, because that is the only way Brady and I get to sit down together.  It also means that there is no "set schedule" and plans often get rearranged, because we are often at the mercy of Mother Nature.  Being a farm wife also means that I always kiss my husband when he gets home from work but am very careful not to touch him anywhere else because he is covered in a mixture of oil, diesel, dirt, and hog manure.  The farm is where we work, where we live, and where we will one day raise our children.  I love the farm and I love being a farm wife, but many women who are in the same position as me do not feel the same way. 

I am so thankful to be married to a man who has his priorities straight.  It is obvious to everyone who knows Brady that his relationship with Jesus is number 1, his relationship with me is number 2, and his career as a farmer is number 3.  Many farm wives find themselves married to a man who has his numbers 2 and 3 flip flopped and number 1 isn't even part of the equation.  Having Jesus as head of our household and marriage really helps to make sure everything else stays in its proper order.  I have heard first hand from multiple farm wives that they often feel like the farm is the other woman or the mistress in their marriage.  This becomes very obvious in those cases when date nights, kids baseball games, and church functions are often missed because the work on a farm is never done. 

The farm has been around in Brady's life for a lot longer than I have, and there is a lot of pressure to work hard and manage it well.  But it is the best feeling knowing that he cares about me and my best interests before those of the farm.  Our marriage is more important than the farm, even during the busy seasons of planting and harvest. 

This past weekend Brady and I attended a marriage conference that our church held in Indianapolis.  We stayed in a hotel downtown and listened to Rob Rienow impart Godly wisdom to all the married couples.  It was a great weekend and I am so thankful that we attended.  I expressed my excitement about attending the conference on Facebook and someone commented, "How are you getting him (Brady) away from the field?"  I was so happy to reply that even though we were still right in the middle of planting, I have a husband who puts his wife ahead of the farm!

Am I saying things are always sunshine and rainbows? Heck no!  Being a farm wife means that sometimes I go to bed alone because Brady is going to be in the field all night.  It also means that I have to wash all Brady's work clothes with a splash of bleach to get the smell out and sometimes I accidently ruin my clothes in the process.  Being married to a farmer also means that I worry about Brady a lot because farming can be a very dangerous job.  Lots of times us spending time together often means we are in a truck, tractor, field, or hog barn.  All those things are totally worth it though, because it is so rare for someone to love their career as much as Brady loves farming.  He loves the farm so much, but he loves me even more! 

We live in a world where we don't talk, we text.  We don't have lengthy conversations, we write 140 character 'tweets' that describe our day in a play by play fashion.  Social media has added a whole new dynamic to our everyday lives, and it hasn't been around that long, so we are still wading through all the changes it has caused in our personal relationships.  I am definitely not a social media hater at all, I am very active on Facebook for my personal and professional life, I write a blog (whenever I make time), I creep on Twitter, and I get inspiration on Pinterest.  But here is the thing about social media...IT IS NOT REAL LIFE!  It is a soapbox...you can make your life appear to be anything you like! 

Most people, myself included, paint a rosy picture on the internet.  We post pictures of smiling faces and flowers on date nights, but the keys stop clicking when our husband forgets our anniversary or comes home late one night and forgets to call.  I am not in any way saying that we should bash our husbands on the internet, but I am saying that when you aren't having the best day or your marriage is going through a rough spot....don't look to Facebook for comfort!  It will only make you feel worse because all your girlfriends are obviously married to Prince Charming, which obviously isn't true. 

Ex's are probably the biggest lurking danger of social media.  Before the social media world invaded our life, ex's could be safely tucked away into fading memories and it was easy to pretend that they had just fallen off the face of the earth.  Social media reminds us that our ex's are still in fact living people.  With the mutual friends that are obtained in a dating relationship, it is hard to completely avoid an ex on the internet, but there are steps that can be taken to ensure that this happens almost never. 

First and foremost...DON'T BE FRIENDS WITH AN EX ON FACEBOOK OR FOLLOW THEM ON TWITTER!  Just don't do it...even if you say nothing bad is going to come of it...nothing good is going to come of it either, so just don't play with fire and leave it alone.  Do not interact with an ex on Facebook, at all!  Don't look at their profile picture, don't message them, nothing.  Also, be completely transparent with your spouse when it comes to social media.  Share passwords and allow your spouse to log on to any of your accounts whenever they would like.  Some married couples even have a joint Facebook page, which can be very beneficial because this also keeps certain unwanted people from contacting you, because they know your spouse will see it. 

Although social  media can be fun and beneficial, it's not always the best thing for a marriage.  When we allow ourselves to get wrapped up in our online lives, even innocent
interactions can divert our time and attention.  It's essential that we guard against distractions so that our spouses never have to wonder which 'friend' is the most important.